I'm not sure what "What kind of idiot designed an oil pickup sump lower than the oil drain plug???" means, or what it refers to. The B2x5 pickup is totally conventional, there is nothing strange or unusual about it. The drain is the lowest point in the pan as it is on every motor I've ever seen.
As for drilling a hole, I imagine it could work but putting it back together in a functional way would be difficult. The pickup is attached to the pan like many modern motors, it doesn't dangle from the bottom end like older engines. (This was a change that happened around the '90s to facilitate assembly and allow for other features like oil coolers... my Volvo and Jeep are both assembled this way)
As for drilling a hole, I imagine it could work but putting it back together in a functional way would be difficult. The pickup is attached to the pan like many modern motors, it doesn't dangle from the bottom end like older engines. (This was a change that happened around the '90s to facilitate assembly and allow for other features like oil coolers... my Volvo and Jeep are both assembled this way)