My sister needs to go to New Jersey for a friend's brother's funeral. She doesn't have a car, and being 19, can't get a rental. My mother isn't keen on helping her out, and I honestly don't want to loan out my still-new-to-me car (especially to drive through NYC and into Jersey).

I'm going to end up saying "yeah sure" unless I can come up with a compelling reason not to. Any open recalls I don't know about? Talk some sense into me about letting teenagers with no road trip experience take nice new cars into crappy parts of states?

NO. Do not loan your car to anyone, its like loaning people money or tools, its just something you don't do if you want to keep your relationship good.

If you have to go unplug a couple of the spark plugs and pour a bottle of sea foam in right before she gets there and then when its starts running on 2 cylinders and bealching smoke like a train maybe she would be too scared to drive it. On the other hand she might be one of those people who won't notice if it was running on 2 cylinders and belching smoke and drive it like that all the way there and back. :roll:

Best just get rid of your sister. I can recommend a good guy for the job on that quadrant of the country, he's not cheap but he does good work. :D

Yeah not your fancy car ;) Just um, offer to buy them a bus pass or something. Or unplug your DI cassette and give it to them but then, "oops it doesn't work"

Of course you should let her drive it so that she hopefully wrecks it and you finally have an excuse to get the c900 you've been secretly wanting ;)

Seriously, though, I'm guessing she's not insured to drive your car, so there's your answer.

Insurance. At least in the state of Ohio, if you loan your car to someone and they get in an accident, you are solely responsible for any damages, unless of course they are insured to drive your car(which I doubt she is).

Insurance. At least in the state of Ohio, if you loan your car to someone and they get in an accident, you are solely responsible for any damages, unless of course they are insured to drive your car(which I doubt she is).

Correct. My insurance by default covers any driver in my legal residence (which as it stands is Mr. Guru) and any driver on a learner permit provided that they are driving "on my license".

Short of deliberately busticating my car, that's the best "no" I can think of. It's smelling a bit like coolant today, so I may already be a winner!

Or you could just own up and tell her your not comfortable loaning her your new car due to the reasons you mentioned in your first post?

I see nothing wrong with this; It is *your* car, right? What's with this day and age of everyone trying to 'sugarcoat' or provide reasoning for something you simply don't want to do.

I'm sure said in a nice tone and correct word choice, she wouldn't be offended. She may be a bit miffed originally, but she'll not hate you forever, and will eventually understand.

-Bny

Or you could just own up and tell her your not comfortable loaning her your new car due to the reasons you mentioned in your first post?


Exactly. But as you've seen in the past, I'm not that rational, and it tends to run in the family ;)

As much as I'd like to let her take it, especially considering how important the trip is, I know it'd be stupid to (especially now that I've noticed a bit of a coolant smell when driving). Her record is spotless, though, and I really don't want to see her miss the funeral.

I think I'll just suck it up and rent her a little Aveo to get her there and back.

Or you could just own up and tell her your not comfortable loaning her your new car due to the reasons you mentioned in your first post?

I see nothing wrong with this; It is *your* car, right? What's with this day and age of everyone trying to 'sugarcoat' or provide reasoning for something you simply don't want to do.

I'm sure said in a nice tone and correct word choice, she wouldn't be offended. She may be a bit miffed originally, but she'll not hate you forever, and will eventually understand.

-Bny

I like the extended middle finger approach. Or extend both fingers, bend your knees slightly and shout "**** you!" :lol:

id just say no.and offer a bus ticket,as 900t suggested.there is no need to explain why. and if you need to justify it for yourself,its YOUR car,and YOU spent YOUR hard earned money to buy it so you would not have to use public transportation unless you wanted to.strictly this mans prospective,but no one drives my car.no way no how.:cool:

Just say you have an even MORE important place to be, that's slightly further away, at 180 degrees in the opposite direction.

Is this the good sister? Or is this the the evil sister who bit your thumb off, stole the plates off one your classic 900, wrecked one of them, and tattooed Saab logos on you while you slept? :D

:cheesy: :cheesy:
Sorry guru, I don't mean to be irreverent or anything, I'm sorry if I offend I'm just in a silly mood tonight.

Won't you still be liable if you rent a car and let her use it?

either way matt.(nobody sees the wizzard)not no way,not no how.:cool:

Well, she just called. I told her I could get her a rental car, and she flipped out on me. Threatened suicide and all that crap. :roll: Right, it's totally my fault! :roll: I'd call my mother, but she probably wouldn't care.

You have to admit, threatening suicide because she can't borrow a car to go to a funeral is borderline hilarious...

You have to admit, threatening suicide because she can't borrow a car to go to a funeral is borderline hilarious...

She might be angrier at me for laughing at that than she is at me for not handing over the keys to my lovely, expensive, possibly broken car.

You have to admit, threatening suicide because she can't borrow a car to go to a funeral is borderline hilarious...
:lol: :lol:

God no. There's a list of people who can drive my car, and my damned parents/immediate family isn't even on it. I would/could never trust someone else with my car, with about four exceptions.

I didn't know pontiacs were hard to drive...(jk I never let anyone drive any of my cars ever, unless there are extreme circumstances, like they have to drive me to the hospital or whatever; if you had a c900, you wouldn't trust your tranny to anyone either, if you know what I mean) ;)

guru, sorry to hear that you sisters are so crazy, my brother is somewhat similar (except less violent) and always is asking for something or "borrowing" something, like the recent "could you drive me and my girlfriend up to poughepsie NY (sp?) - I can't because of my medication..." Sadly, I can never help but give in (I love my brother too much and always wind up feeling sorry for him for various reasons that would take too long to get into)

Call her on the suicide bid. She sounds like a totally immature 19yr old to me, if she threatens to top herself because she can't borrow your car then she's not responsible enough to be borrowing it in the 1st place. Get her a red-eye Greyhound. ;)

Get her a red-eye Greyhound. ;)

Offered her that, too. "Waaaaaaaaaah but the bus doesn't gooooooo there waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah".

I don't know about you guys, but I just dislike it when people threaten suicide because I can't bail them out after their lack of planning screws them over.

You feel like taking a drive? Accompany her.

Go site see in NY/NJ :lol:

if your mother wont lend her a car either then you definately shouldnt feel bad about doing the same!
Just tell her that you need it, or be truthful and say you will lend her your expensive new car if she lends you something of the same value and scale first.

Threatened suicide and all that crap. :roll:
Is that the type of tactic she usually employs to get what she wants? If so, then all the more reason to not lend her your car.

Call her on the suicide bid. She sounds like a totally immature 19yr old to me, if she threatens to top herself because she can't borrow your car then she's not responsible enough to be borrowing it in the 1st place. Get her a red-eye Greyhound. ;)

Agreed. I can't help but feel that if you give in to her on this occasion that she will do it again and again. Eventually she'll threaten suicide (or possibly attempt it) for attention and it'll go horribly wrong. She's an adult and needs to learn to smart her way out of the situation, not emotionally abuse those around her.

I'd say you've done your job. Tell her to try and think her way there, and if she can't, then it's obviously not that important to her. Do her a favour, and don't help her out. She needs to learn to take responsibility for her own things.

Kenneth

I wouldn't lend her a car on the basis that as has been said before, she appears too immature to be trusted, another family member has said no, it is your car, and to be perfectly reasonable, if she wants to take a drive, she should go buy her own car....

There are very few people I would trust to drive my car, and I suspect this is the same of a lot of people... (My policy is the same as my theory for guns, political power and brussels sprouts; simply if you want a gun, or want to be powerful through politics, you are clearly the wrong kind of person to be in possesion of such things... the sprouts, I just don't like them)

if the trip is that important, she will catch a bus, get a train or even figure out the cash to fly (my US geography is nil, so if NH and NY/Jersey are like 50 miles apart or something......well I will blame my only knowing one route in the states; how to get from manhatten to redbank/leonardo in jersey - I am a big kevin smith fan... what can I say. )

edit: I just googled the route - 500 mile round trip... even those I trust with my car could go sing for that....

No Ali bad idea, plust a friends brother in NJ sounds pretty removed for a funeral. Nobody else from the area is going?

No Ali bad idea, plust a friends brother in NJ sounds pretty removed for a funeral. Nobody else from the area is going?

Nope, it's a friend from college in Vermont, but the brother used to come up and visit every other weekend or somesuch.

Either way, my car has an appointment on Monday for a free pre-trip inspection. It's not going on any trips, but it's a free inspection and yet another understandable reason not to send the car to Jersey. (She doesn't understand "but it's MINE" but she does seem to have a good handle on "it needs to be fixed".)

EG,

I can only think of 1 person i MAY trust my car with (besides my wife) and that's only because he owns 2 Viggens and is as anal about car care as i am.

And he is not a family member.

Perhaps one of the moderators (I bow/genuflect here) could make a 'Family Counselling' forum?

It would be a fun place to stick one's psycho family/friend/cat issues and we would know where to go for an amusing read and to leave pithy comments etc.....Have someone with a psych degree moderate it and voila - the value add of spending hours on SC skyrockets!

And mad props to not lending your precious saab.

you should have disconnected the battery then told her to take you for a test drive to prove that she can drive it well. Then when it doesn't start, flip out and threaten suicide unless she undoes whatever she just did to ruin it! that'd get her going for a while atleast.. then when she leaves, just put the battery back on.. then say it cost you $600 to replace (insert part here).. now that will make her feel bad!

brian- that is a truly insidious plan. i love it!:cool:

I hope you didnt let her take it, Ali. Especially if she throws a suicidal temper tantrum like a 14 year old...not to mention if she's never driven on a road trip before. You need balls to drive in NJ and NY :lol: especially on the Cross-Bronx, fugghedaboutit!

If she doesnt like Greyhound, theres also Amtrak...